Giving

‘You offer water, flowers,incense to the Buddha. By offering these beautiful things. Several things happen.
One, you start to create a detachment from these things. Does that mean you become a cold uncaring nobody that hangs out on the streets, just a beggar, a homeless person? No. A detachment from things is to have things and it doesn’t create suffering or not having it doesn’t create suffering.
Objects don’t become causes for you to suffer anymore. So you start creating a positive detachment to things. That’s one.
Two: You create a positive purification to miserliness, selfishness, greed and we can let go of things easier. When we are less greedy, less miserly, what’s the results? We have a little less money but we have more happiness. Have you heard the saying?
(The best wealth that we can have is the one we have given away)
Not the wealth we kept.
That doesn’t bring any happiness. Isn’t that wise? Let’s think about that again.
So by offering these things, They are not gold bars, they are not businesses. They are water offerings, beautiful offering items, everyday you practice. Giving. And it leads to something deeper.
It leads to emotional giving. Some of us can give money away. Easily. But we can never be wrong. I know people like that. They can give money away very easily, buy anything for you. They love you, they tell you they love you. They can give anything away but emotionally they can’t give away. They never can be wrong. They will never confess they are wrong, they rather hide their wrong, and lose everything. Than to confess they are wrong.
And that is the highest sort of miserliness you can experience. Why? Cause that type of miserliness makes that person not respected, not loved, dejected and it makes them know they are not doing the right thing. So it leads to that. It leads to what? It leads to emotional giving in a good way.
Highly realized practitioners can give up their wife, or not have one for you. Meaning they can spend their whole life as dharma practitioners. Monks or nuns. And not be attached to partners. For you. It’s a giving.
People who have to have a wife, have to have a husband, have to have a partner, and that overrides Dharma. They are actually not giving.
So they are very far away from Buddhahood. There’s no Buddha that needs a consort. There’s no Buddha that needs a partner. There’s no Buddha that needs a wife or a husband. If they needed one, it would be a Buddha.
So therefore, the highest practitioners, they can come back life after life happy and single.
Really happy and single. Not frustrated. You know how some people say “Oh I’m happy to be single” but you know they are not. It’s just that they can’t get anybody. So they pretend that they are happy but they are not.
But they won’t be happy being non single either.
Because their happiness doesn’t come from being single or non single. So what happens?

The highest form of giving is emotional giving.
To be able to easily let go of one’s attachments.
Imagine telling a person: “Oh, can you be a nun?” They will say no. Why? “Oh I can’t, I need a boyfriend.” Or “can you be a monk?” “Oh I can’t, I need a wife. Or I need romance. But I want to practice giving.” I’m like okay.

It doesn’t match. Those people they in fact hamper their spiritual growth. Is it possible to have a spiritual relationship with a partner and they can help each other grow? Yes definitely possible. There are people who can be with their partners, and they can grow together and help each other grow. It’s definitely possible. But that one we have to check out ourselves. When we are with our partners, so we want to do more? Do we become better? Is our minds more focused? Are we accomplishing more? That’s what we need to check with ourselves.

So to be Buddhist practitioners do we need to be always single? Not necessary. For some yes, it is necessary.
Just like for some, they need to take the vow of not taking alcohol. Because by drinking alcohol they create violence, unhappiness in people’s lives. So for some people, they need to take the vow.
But for some, they no need to take the vow, cause for them taking alcohol is to relax, just make others happy, it’s a social thing, doesn’t create anything. So it’s ok.
It’s not the alcohol that’s the bad karma, it’s what you do with it.
So it’s not your partner, your wife, your boyfriend or your alcohol or your fun, or your branded stuff that makes you a better person or that’s bad. It’s what you do with it afterwards.
So if you take branded things, and you become arrogant, you want to go around showing off to other people and put other people down or you want to show you’re somebody. Then that branded item creates negative karma for you. So it’s not the branded item, it’s your mind. So what should you do?
Don’t have branded items for the moment.
Why?
Because you’re suffering when you don’t have it. It means you definitely do not need it. That’s how we check ourselves. But be honest with Buddha.
If you can’t be honest with Buddha, then you will never be Buddha and progress on your spiritual practice. ‘
His Eminence Tsem Tulku Rinpoche

 

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Quotes by His Eminence Tsem Tulku Rinpoche

GuruTsemTulkuRinpoche

Tsem Rinpoche: Praise to Avalokitesvara, the supreme Lord of Compassion. A true teacher will be kind to all levels of people and will not see the differences between them except how to be kind and benefit them. He looks upon them to relieve their sufferings to some degree. A true follower of this teacher will do the same in order to follow the teacher’s footsteps. Therefore a disciple who wishes to please a TRUE teacher will be humble, take care of the teacher’s circle of students and people and treat everyone well. When we treat the teacher’s people well, we treat the teacher well. When we are kind to everyone, WE PLEASE THE TRUE TEACHER TREMENDOUSLY because a true teacher only wants the best for us and the best is to have a kind and generous and unbiased mind. When we are kind, we benefit ourselves and others so much. To be humble is to gain and earn everyone’s respect and open the Vajra Yogini (Buddhahood) nature within us. To be biased is to keep the Vajra Yogini nature locked away. Our goal as a spiritualist is to open the Vajra Yogini nature inherit in all of us. Sarva Mangalam. Tsem Rinpoche

Tsem Rinpoche: The amount of suffering, fear and pain they have to experience should be experienced by no one whether animal or human. It is heartbreaking to continuously see the sufferings animals endure for our ‘pleasures’. I do feel helpless, but helpless or not, we must create more awareness tirelessly. With awareness, their suffering can eventually be reduced. The ones who are slaughtered, it’s too late. We can only shed tears but we have to still be concerned about future slaughter of animals and try to prevent. Helping and being kind to animals is not spiritual, strange or unnatural, but pure empathy of understanding their pain in that no sentient beings would want to suffer. Tsem Rinpoche

Tsem Rinpoche: I rarely feel lonely. I am quite fine being alone. I sometimes feel more lonely with many people than I do by myself. Tsem Rinpoche

http://www.tsemrinpoche.com/

Venerable Hai Tao Dharma Advice from Myanmar Monks

海濤法師 緬甸傳統佛教文化

-Offering of popcorn n honey to Buddha & dedicate to aborted babies/miscarriage babies for quick swift rebirth.

-Offer ginkgo/Sugar Apple 释迦果to Triple Gems to eliminate strokes
-Unripened Pineapples & honey, refrigerate 2-3 days, eat once a day, to reduce stomach cancer pain.
-For relieve vegetative state patients from that state of suffering, offer coconut rice & smoke offerings to Buddha on Fridays
– Poor eyesight, depression, use olives橄榄 to offer to Triple gems. After which to consume 3 a day
-Use tamarind to offer to Triple Gems, can eliminate heart problems
-For heart problem & high blood pressure patients, offer water to Buddha & offer water for others to consume
– To eliminate depression & sadness, offer up light offerings before Buddha & look at them for 5 minutes.
-For leg pains, before sleeping, immerse legs for 10minutes in warm water with coarse salt. Dry legs with dry cloth. Do not have fan or a/c turned on.
-Sponsoring old folks home with medications, dedicating the merits to drug users to eradicate karma
-Offering coconut water with Mani pills to Buddha, & give drug users to drink, will assist them in eliminating the bad habit
-For headaches, use a piece of brass to touch the painful area. & place it there for 5 minutes to remove pain
-To relieve bodily aches, eat more red dates
-To relieve backaches, before sleep, apply ointment驱风油 & sesame oil麻油 on back areas.
-To relieve coughs, boil ginger & honey to drink. Add 3 pieces of plywood below pillow
-To relieve sore throats, can eat raw aloe vera 蘆薈. For women with menstrual cramps, can eat them too. 1-2inches of aloe vera for 3 weeks
– Use our bodies to help our parents to prostrate/pray to Buddha & dedicate the merits for their good health
– Living in a single parent family since young, can animal liberate a pair of female & male birds, hoping for next rebirth to have a complete parental family
– Parents should offer the kind of flowers they love to Buddha & dedicate for their children to have a blissful life and be filial towards them
– For parents & children who are not harmonious, take your child’s photo, use a red pen to draw a circle. Place it under your child’s pillow for sleep, for effective communication between parents and children
– Offering prayer banners at a Buddha Pagoda佛塔, will make children more studious and better at studying & at work
– Offering walking sticks拐杖to monastics sangha, will in turn let children be more obedient. The virtuous actions will lead the children in the right directions
-For children with a bad temper, can gift the child a fan小扇子accessory in gold or silver & adorn on body. Can eradicate the bad temper.
-When a child doesn’t listen to parents, parents can offer a cup of water to Buddha, & recite this while offering the water :”May my child be obedient & listen to our words.” & then give the water to the child to drink.
– Liberating small fishes can result in a more blissful marriage & successful events
– To minimize quarrels between couples, offer sweets to Buddha
– Falling in love with a person whom you shouldn’t be with, offer vegetarian buns to Buddha. To eliminate the wrongful love/cravings
– For married couples to have a blissful happy relationship, offer 3 vegetarian buns to Buddha on Fridays
– If a married couple’s marriage is on the rocks, use a red photo frame to place the couple’s photo within
– If a married woman is infertile, try liberating small fishes to improve fertility rates. Works best when done personally
– Donating chairs to children’s home or old folks home can improve & eliminate the strained relationships between siblings/relatives/friends
– Offering glutinous rice to Buddha will improve brotherly/sisterly/friends relationships
– Offer 3 lotus candles to Buddha will benefit our existing fathers
– Every Wednesday, Thursday, offer a ceramic bowl with rice to Buddha to eradicate squabbles & bad karmic affiliation between 2 persons. The rice must after which be given to other beings to eat.
– Having daughters at home, offer beautiful clothing to Avalokiteshvara / GuanYin 观世音菩萨 to ensure that daughter will not have sexual misconduct and to eradicate lustful advances. & to have Buddha’s blessings being bestowed. (Offered clothing are not to be taken back but to be handled by temple)
– When family doesn’t like practicing Buddhism, sponsor Sutra/Dharma books to monasteries. Offer 3 cups of tea to Buddha & dedicate to family
– When children are disobedient, offer tea on Tuesdays to Buddha. With a lotus in tea cup.
– Offering bananas to Buddha will ensure financials will not be drained
– For business to be prosperous, offer 3 artificial white flowers to Buddha
– For business to be prosperous, fill a glass bottle with rice husks & place in company. (Alternatively, you can also use white sugar to offer to Buddha)
– When someone wants to inflict harm intentionally unto you, use vegetarian soaps and offer to 5寶(Buddha, Dharma, Sangha, Parents and Dharma Seniors). After 5 days, you can use offered soaps for personal showers
-For individuals who crave masturbating, use a glass cup filled with water, place stones in it. Cover a leaf over the top of cup. Offer to Buddha for 7 days, after which pour it away. Do it consistently and frequently to break away the habitual tendency of masturbation. Can dedicate this to children too, to break away their habitual tendency that increases one’s lust and desire.
– Do this for meat lovers, offer fruits in a covered offering bowl. Upon offering to Buddha, open the cover. Dedicating for the person that his or her cravings for consuming meat will be lessened significantly
– For smokers to eradicate their cravings for smoking. Use a red heart image and draw a white 十(symbols of 2 cigarettes) . & place it under his or her pillow. Change it every 3 days with a new piece.
– Hoping that others don’t smoke or drink alcohol, do virtuous deeds and dedicate merits to smokers and drinkers that they will eliminate this unvirtuous action
– To help the person eliminate boastfulness and lying tendencies, offer peanuts to Buddha on his or her behalf
– To pray for world peace, conduct a 9 days prayer sessions. On the last day, dedicate the merits to all sentient beings for peacefulness. & lastly all to consume sweet desserts.
– If seeking monastic paths as monks or nuns and obstacles arises, use Refuge Name daily instead of birth name. & to make aspiration wishes in front of Buddha for ordination to happen soon.
– Offer popcorn米花 and milk牛奶 to Buddha, especially to Padmasambhava(莲花生大士)

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Tendencies (excerpt) – His Eminence Tsem Tulku Rinpoche

“Non virtuous actions have 3 types of effects according to Lord Buddha.
1)Ripened effect
2)Effect similar to the cause
3)Environmental Effect
So all non virtuous actions created from contaminated mind, contaminated mind means mind that thinks of oneself more important than the other. & all your actions are based on myself as opposed to others. That is contaminated mind. So contaminated mind creates contaminated actions, so contaminate actions have 3 types of effects. “
Ripened effect is the actions they ripened and they give us the effect. Example: if we kill, if we harm our parents, if we create schism, and it damages many people, example we talk negative things between 2 governments and they go to war, they kill millions of people, schism. If we talk and act in such a way that creates harm and damage to people in such an intense way, the ripened effect will be we take rebirth, the most severe is hell. One of the 8 hells. The next severest is to take rebirth as a spirit, or hungry ghost, the next severest will be as an animal.
So the immediate ripened effect, example killing.
Will be the 3 lower realms.
How we kill, the motivation whether we regret, the manner, on purpose or not, all effects how we take rebirth. Immediate ripened effect.
Second:
Effect similar to cause means what? Even after we have experienced number one the ripening effect, traces of that inclination will remain. Let me explain.
If we have killed, we take rebirth in hell, but we take rebirth in hells, to purify the karma of killing, but the intent to kill is not purified. The mind is still there.
So when we take rebirth again, we will be inclined to kill again and take rebirth in negative states of birth again and again. So what happens is: now the first karma is instant ripening of the result of the karma. Second is you still have to suffer the tendencies or the effects similar to the cause. So the very reason you went to hell was for killing, but when you come out of hell, you still want to kill. So what happens is: you still want to harm. Example: tigers. When they die, they collect tremendous negative karma for killing other sentient beings and creating fear, so when they reincarnate again, they will still have the tendency to kill.
Once they go down, they go down very low, that’s why some kids when you see them, they love to kill animals. They enjoy, they squeal! Some they can’t take it. They can’t take it at all, it’s very difficult for them. That’s the tendency resembling the original cause. They will suffer from that.
What’s the big deal about that? Because the tendency will make you do it again, even if you are in a new environment. So if you wipe your slate clean, and you start killing again. What’s the point? “
Another example that is stated in the text is:

If we always have sexual misconduct, we cheat on our partners, we lie to our partners, we use our partners for wrong things, or we do the wrong things with our partners that are wrong. If we have sexual misconduct, taking rebirth in the 3 lower realms is a given. And the ripening effect will be loneliness, cannot close our business deal, people we love don’t love us back, people create violence towards us. People want to harm us. People want to damage us. So when we have sexual misconduct, negative actions such as harm, damage, violence will come our way. That’s one, that’s what it says.

And even after you had purify your sexual misconduct negative karma, the effect similar to the cause, will ripen which is tendency. What is that? Let’s say that due to sexual misconduct, you took rebirth as an animal. After you take rebirth as an animal, when you come out, you’re human again, you will still have the tendency to not be true to the one you promised. So what happens? You create a lot of pain in their minds. And you know what happens is; this is your tendency. You will have strong attachment to other partners. What does that mean? You cannot be true. So that means you can be with one person, but you will be looking at another one and another one and another one … Plotting how to get them, plotting how to date them, plotting how to get close to them, plotting how to get intimate with them while you’re with that person.
Even if you don’t want to and you know it’s wrong, but you will keep doing that because that’s a residual tendency left which is in fact similar to the cause. Why? You didn’t hold onto your sexual misconduct vows.
So when you don’t hold onto your sexual misconduct vows, you have the ripening effect, which is the taking of rebirth in the 3 lower realms depending on situation.
Secondary, is, that even when you come out with a clean slate, the karma is clean, but the tendency is not. So the tendency is not clean, even if you want to go straight, you want to be with one person, one girl, one boy, one relationship, you cannot.
You will cheat, and lie, and cheat and lie, hurt your children, hurt your friends, hurt your neighbors, break the trust of your friends, and have a lot of enemies and people coming and beat you up, and they want to knock you over, they want to hurt you. Why?
Cause you can’t control yourself.
Why can’t you?
Cause tendency is there still. 
So holding onto the sexual misconduct vows are very important according to Lord Buddha, why? He is giving you knowledge. 
That’s why ancient cultures, truth is truth, never mind Buddhism. Truth is truth. That’s why ancient cultures like China, India, all these great cultures, very advanced, they are very strong about moral ethics.
If you have one person, you stay with one person. We don’t cheat, we don’t do all kinds of things, why?
They know that hurts people.
So Buddha goes one step further. The karma is very strong.
Third:
Environmental effect:
So I had explained to you the direct effect, the effect resembling the cause(the tendency not being able to get rid of it, the tendencies will grow)& what’s the horrible thing is; once you indulge in the tendencies, you will replenish that negative karma, clean slate becomes dirty again. So it’s like you filled up your petrol to hell, your car with petrol again, full tank. Think about it. So on the way to hell, your petrol keeps refilling. Why? Tendency similar to the cause is there.
So some people do retreats, they do retreat after retreat, they still can’t control their mouths. They still throw BF.
They still want power, they still want to be the top, they’re still greedy, why?
Maybe that karma for that action is purified, but the tendency is still there. So how to cut the tendency, we must hold our vows.
People say it’s very hard, why tell me why it’s hard, I know it’s hard, if you understand, easier to attack it.
This is Mind teaching by Lord Buddha by the way. “

“SNAKES, ROOSTERS & PIGS (Part 3)” – Tsem Tulku Rinpoche

A short excerpt from His Eminence teachings in Video 3:

“It’s not the actions that make it negative. It’s the intent. It’s not the intent that makes it negative, it’s the habituation from which the intent arises.”

“You don’t have the habituation to keep your intent real & alive. That’s why habituation is very powerful. Habituation arises from holding your vows. The ability to hold your vows is a collection of merits that you have. The collection of merits helps you to keep the vows to get you to higher attainments. The purification of your negative karma stops you from breaking your vows. How strong your purification is, helps you to keep your ethics, morality and vows. And how strong you keep your vows, creates the actual re-habituation of what you have been doing for many times.
So if you always happily say I broke my vows, then happily be unhappy. Keep being happy with unhappy. So if you’re unhappy with yourself, keep breaking promises, keep breaking your vows, keep breaking your commitments, keep disturbing and destroying your samaya, keep doing it. Why? You’re happy being unhappy. Don’t you see people always depressed? Always unsuccessful? Things are going wrong? They’re always getting angry, can’t move, can’t transform, they’re stuck in their own little selfish world. Year after year after year and they never ever change. And they go on and on in their narrow little self grasping worlds.
Why? They don’t keep their vows. They don’t do purification practices to allow them to keep their vows. It’s all connected. So when you hold your vows, they’re not a prison.
Listen carefully. When you hold your vows, Pratimoksha, self liberation vows such as Refuge, Bodhichitta and Tantric vows, when you do hold your vows, rather than being put into prison and not allowing yourself to do things you like, you are releasing yourself from prison. Because you create the actual causes for yourself to enjoy the object in which you are attached to without accruing negative karma and hence you become Mukpo…
How do you check if your actions are good or not? You look at the people around you, are you affecting their lives? Are you changing their attitudes? Are you giving them a new perspective? Are you giving them hope? Do they leave you with knowledge, happiness and wisdom? If they are leaving you with knowledge happiness and wisdom, then you are giving them more hope, love and care, then whatever you’re doing, your methods are working. Whether you’re jumping up and down at them, or you’re sitting there giving them a massage, it doesn’t matter cause your actions don’t matter anymore. It’s your intent. And that’s what Mukpo is all about. He doesn’t operate from our reality, he operates from a reality of a non grasping mind. It’s very different and hence his actions are different.”

“SNAKES, ROOSTERS & PIGS (Part 1)” – His Eminence #TsemTulku Rinpoche

A short excerpt from His Eminence teachings in Video 1:

“When we want to go for Dharma, a lot of obstacles happen. Do you know why? It’s the best thing we can ever do for ourselves. When we want to do really good things a lot of obstacles arise. When we want to do not so good things, no obstacle will arise. It is very easy. Good things always have obstacles arise because good things get us good things. So it’s very difficult. In this day & age, Dharma Protector practice is very very important. For those who have correct Samaya, who know how to practice it correctly, it’s very very important. Why?

In this day & age we have much more obstacles than people in the past. People in the past have outer obstacles. Outer obstacles like getting food, crops to grow, weather, ghosts, wars, famine, traveling & bandits. Today, outer obstacles are there, inner obstacles are more. What are the inner obstacles?
Relationships, not having one is an obstacle, having one is an obstacle. Having more than one is an obstacle, having one & wanting another is an obstacle. Having one & not being happy with one is an obstacle. Why?
Then we spend all our time like an animal in heat after this relationship. & then anger, it’s a very big obstacle for all of us. Why? Although physically, all is very convenient. Everything in life is very convenient now. Getting what we want is convenient but there is this dissatisfaction of not finding happiness. Not finding happiness although things are more convenient, creates frustrations & anger.
& anger, when anger arises, I’m not talking about anger that helps. I’m talking about real anger. I’m not talking about a Mother who yells & screams at us because she loves us. I’m talking about anger that you didn’t get what you wanted & someone else did & you’re not happy. When that anger arises, we say things that we regret terribly. We hurt people that we regret. & we do things in revenge. & we get people back emotionally that creates tremendous negative karma for us. Anger is a very big obstacle. Very very big.
Jealousy. Not being able to stand other people having better things than us. & not being able to take what they have. & not being to accept what they have. Those are huge obstacles for us. Huge. & our preoccupation with work, money, many of us are preoccupied with money. & for money, we will do many things that will demean us, that will put us down, that will take us away from who we are. & that will actually make us look very bad to ourselves and bring us into bad habits. For money, we will sink ourselves to the lowest. We will literally kiss anybody, you know what, behind. We will say anything we want to get money. We will be nice to people, we will show a sweet face, we will show teeth. A lot of teeth you know. We will do a lot of things to get money. We will forfeit our Dharma practice, we will break our vows. We will break our commitments & Samaya. & we will work long long hours in hopes of getting money.
Whether we get money or not never mind, we can work 10-15 hours a day to get money. We can travel long distances for money. We can justify to our families & friends for money. We can put away our practices for money. We can even give up our life, our time & our energy for money. We can do all that. Wanting money & needing money is different. 
Wanting money & chasing after it all the time, & using that as a source of so called happiness is a very big obstacle in modern times. I will tell you why; because modern times you have videos, tvs, cds, movies, dvds, you have the west, you have the east, opulence, indulgences, you have the lifestyle of the rich & famous. You have all these famous people who show you the pretty side of having money, but that’s only 5%, the ugly side you won’t get to see. & they promote that and they let you know. Ignorant people will want to believe that, & want to be like them. But when we see all those things, we want it. & that’s a big obstacle, you know why? Cause nowadays there are much more shows on “Wealth”, it increases more desires in us. Cause all the beautiful things you see in wealth are just pictures. They are not real you know? You don’t see what goes on behind. You don’t.
& wealth is a huge obstacle, Huge. & time. Distraction of time. 
Many of us can’t hang out in a room & keep quiet with our-self. We have to be here, go there, do this & that, it’s very hard for us to be with ourselves. Why is it hard for us to be with ourselves? Because, Silence to many of us equates Loneliness. Loneliness is something without activity. & being lonely is something that everybody fears. They fear it very much but they don’t understand, loneliness is a state of mind, not who you’re with. You can be with somebody & you can be totally lonely. You can’t relate with them, you can’t understand them, just because you’re with somebody doesn’t mean you’re not lonely. Some people are with people that makes them feel lonelier. Much much lonelier. Some people are alone but they are not lonely. Lonely is not being with someone or having to be with someone. Loneliness is a state of mind, that we don’t accept who we are inside. & therefore we need to be distracted with other people to make us look away from ourselves. So being lonely is not being with someone or finding someone or having someone. Living under a delusion: ‘ Oh I have somebody, I have a lover, I have a friend, I have whatever & I’m not lonely.’ In fact some of the most loneliest people in the world are people who have somebody. Think about it.
& then we will do everything. We will cook for this person, we will live for this person, we will change our lives for this person, we will do everything for this person. In hopes that we won’t be lonely. But the more we become slaves to these people, the more we become lonely.
We are not a slave to these people, we are a slave to our loneliness. The fear of accepting who we are, who we really are inside. So instead of facing who we are directly, we distract it. With new friends, new scenes, new clubs, new lovers, new sex positions, new clothes.
So loneliness is not being with someone or not being with someone. Loneliness is not accepting yourself. & who you are & what you need to improve. See when we know what is wrong with us, & we keep hiding that, & we avoid certain people, we avoid certain situations, those people & those situations we can avoid, but we can’t avoid ourselves. So when we hate ourselves because of our loneliness, you know what happens?
It’s that wherever we go or whoever we are with, it’s just a distraction. But we have to come home, we have to go to sleep, we have to be alone, we have to drive, even if you’re the busiest person, even if you have to go & take a poop, you have to be alone, I know of friends who need their dog to watch them while taking a poop. I have interesting friends. Anyways,
Loneliness is when you can’t accept who you are. The faults you have inside of you, the good points that you dare not see and it’s hard to be good, because you live in a society that doesn’t teach you to be good. It’s hard to be honest. It’s hard to be straightforward, it’s hard to tell people you’re normal, it’s hard to tell people you don’t have powers, it’s hard to tell people you make mistakes too. It’s hard to tell people that & it’s hard to tell yourself that.
So you become lonely. So how get away from that loneliness?
We find a lot of things to do, places to drive to, people to go with, & every time we eat we need somebody with us, whatever we do, we must have somebody with us. Non stop. Why? Because it distracts us from our loneliness. & that loneliness is not facing who we really are. The good points & the bad points. Another play of ego.
So therefore, in modern life, loneliness is more predominant.
Loneliness is not being somewhere, being something, having something, or being with someone, loneliness is not daring to look at our faults. & pushing towards improvements. & therefore we want to be distracted from what we see in ourselves we don’t like. So we want to have loud music, parties, beautiful people, friends, books, we want to have anything & everything. To not think about what we are inside. & the incredible thing is that, people don’t realize is that, all the effort they put towards looking for relationships, maintaining a relationship, oh my God, just getting a relationship, all the work you have to put into, & once you get it, boy do you get it.
& once you leave it, you’re stuck, you look for another one. And that’s just an ugly cycle that goes on and on and on. & once you’re in this relationship, you’re still very lonely, because if you weren’t lonely, you won’t be looking at everybody passing on the street. You wouldn’t. You wouldn’t at all.
& then we get depressed, we become unhappy, we become more lonelier, we find out the person we are with is not who we thought, is not what we like, they restrict us, they don’t respect us, they cut us down, arguments, disagreements, unhappiness & all that are distractions.
Why are there distractions? Because those things take us away from the real purpose why we are here.
So if you talk to a bunch of Samsara’s people who don’t know anything, of course they agree with you. When you talk to the ‘evil’ Guru from Tibet, he’s going to tell you the opposite right? Because he is ‘nasty’, he is ‘horrible’. He tells us we have to be a better person.”

Love Without Agenda by His Eminence Tsem Tulku Rinpoche

A short excerpt from His Eminence teachings in video 1:

“Renounce actually means giving up the methods that brings unhappiness to ourselves & the people around us.

Ego means the mind that cherishes oneself more than others. Every action that we do we feed it. When we feed the ego, when we feed this mind, the lack of awareness for others, through not carrying out responsibilities, through not keeping promises,through not keeping commitments, or not putting efforts.
When we do those actions, what happens? We can explain it in a way to others or friends, but since they are most likely at our level, they can understand it. But the truth of the matter is, we are actually feeding the ego even more. So when we feed the ego even more, the very action the very reason, we cannot give up, becomes the very reason for us to suffer even more.& to create the karmic circumstances for other people around us to suffer even more. So therefore, that concept, is not very hard to understand. It’s something that we are not used to hearing. But when we hear it, whether we accept it at this moment, or engage it at this moment or not, we remain & contemplate n think, cause deep down inside, we feel that it resonates with something. We feel that it is true. That it does make sense. And that’s what keeps us in the Dharma. That’s what keeps us in spiritual practice. That’s what keeps us pushing ourselves towards spiritual practice because these words resonates & also with what we have done with our lives. Not being aware, is a facade of the self cherishing mind.
Example if we prefer reading fashion magazines as compared with Dharma books, very easy to flip through it & we are intensely reading it, we will find that, reading is reading, words is words, meaning is meaning, but one finds one meaning easy & the other difficult. So that’s how we detect our mind. To say we don’t have time to read, or we can’t read, or I’m not really a reader, I’m not able to read, we have to check if our minds are consistent, if it’s consistent or not.
So if our mind is consistent, in all forms of reading, or maybe we are illiterate but most likely that’s not the case, so the important thing is this; If we come across a difficulty, make it simple, it is difficult because we have not pushed ourselves towards that direction. If we don’t push ourselves towards that direction, we may be losing out on something very great, in the sense of spiritual practice. Some people may go through tremendous spiritual hardships or difficulties throughout their lives, one obstacle after another, one suffering, one letdown after another yet they don’t ever stop practicing. But for them, for worldly things, business or cooking, fishing if they are not successful after a few times, they give up. Why? Because their habitations is not towards that. Some people when it’s towards Dharma practice, they give up very easily, but towards fishing, entertainment, singing, laying around or having a good time, they don’t give up easily. Why?
It’s a clear indication of the state of their mind. Again, I want you to get out of the framework that it’s criticism, it’s not. I’m giving you a guideline to check. It may seem like criticism to some people who’s guilty, self guilty of the actions. They will feel uncomfortable but it’s not criticism from me, why? It’s presentation of information. Presentation of incredible information that we can use as guidelines for our lives. For our relationships, for what we want to accomplish, for the  people around us. Therefore, if we always find something difficult, & in this case I’m talking about spiritual practice, then that can be very dangerous for us. Why?
The mind can make many types of excuses, justifications, covers & fears to not engage in spiritual practice. Or while we are engaging, it’s not sincere or real. And the mind is distracted & we fill our time up by substituting it with other things that will make the time go away. So the important factor is we must examine our minds. We must face our minds. If we don’t face our minds, the people we feel secure around will one day be gone, that’s for sure. That’s definitely for sure, or we will be gone before them, if we don’t confront our minds, the very opportunity we have in front of us like health will be gone, or a dharma centre can be gone or closed, or great monasteries have been destroyed, great teachers die, great masters get killed, so when we have this great opportunity in front of us, and we don’t engage in it, what we need to do is; what I was told by my teacher was; to in fact meditate and contemplate, truly meditate & contemplate on the impermanence on everything around us. Whoever we are attached to, wherever we want to escape to, whoever we want to hold onto , whatever that is, we have to contemplate on its impermanence. Why?
Because it’s the ultimate universal truth. Impermanence is the truth that cannot be taken away by any philosophy or religion. To feel the urgency not to lose the chance, that one is not debatable.”

2 short excerpts from the His Eminence teachings in video 2:

-“So what happens is, if you need to speak up & you don’t speak up, if you are quiet & u let it happen, you expect other people to show you the way, or you expect other people to guide you, give you the directions, & you don’t want to be the leading light, you don’t want to be the direction, you don’t want to make the effort, you expect others to do, & if they don’t, then you will say I didn’t get the direction. Then that’s incorrect. Why is that incorrect? To a certain level you are correct if you’re a child, but if you’re an adult, then no. You must make an effort.

Buddha went to the forest & meditated on his own. He didn’t blame other people if he didn’t get enlightened. He did not.
So therefore, what’s important is not to think that our enlightenment is dependent on how other people act towards me. Or my spiritual development is how important people act towards me. How they act towards me does not contribute to that. Why? Then it’s letting laziness take over again. Then if laziness takes over we become disillusioned, we give up, we don’t want to do or we become like Sunday Practitioners we just recite empty & we don’t actually fight it. This is very dangerous. Why? Cause every other day, you are just yourself, you don’t care, but on Sundays you’re all holy smoley. No. So what’s important is; we need to check our mind, clearly. The direction we are going to & we need to ask ourselves one question. & I use this one cause its fundamental for all of us.
If we love other people the way we say we love, and even if they don’t know what we are doing, we know. Especially after we listen to the Dharma. We know. Do we love the people we love? If we love the people we love, then we will stop making excuses for the lack of transformations, Dharma practice & inabilities, we will stop. If we don’t stop, it’s very clear we don’t love anyone but ourselves. But the ultimate joke is; we actually don’t love ourselves cause in the end we are alone & we suffer even more.
So if we love others, if we love the people we love, repaying their kindness, or even not to burden them, we have to transform ourselves. We have to.”
-“So if we have a Lama who’s kind enough to guide us, shows us the way, with no agenda. We should grab that opportunity. If we have met a Lama or an organization or a place that we feel loved, loved on an Ultimate sense, caring for our future & our rebirths, we should grab that chance.

We should promote it. We should sponsor it. We should help it. We should do all the work we can instead of being afraid of commitments, we shouldn’t be, why? It’s the only strand of hope we have for ourselves & others. & not make excuses. Not let time pass by, lose more hair, we lose more of our energy, and our health, how much time do we actually have left? Even the high Lamas have to pass away, I went to my Guru’s funeral recently, they opened a funeral & I saw his body burning in front of me, it woke me up. Why did it wake me up? I would tell you the truth.
I prayed that I will never have relationships in this life and future lives, never. That would distract me away. May I never have children. Never. I prayed in front of his body. May I never be engaged in work that just focuses on making money. & I prayed that if I’m born in a rich country rich family, poor country, poor family, may I use the circumstances to turn it around to bring Dharma to others. That’s what I prayed for in front of his burning body. You wanna know why?
Because I’m scared. I visualize myself inside there. With my legs and body burning away and melting. Scared. You know even when I see his body burning,  I received a holy teaching.”